Tag Archives: bully

Learn How Self-Regulation and Bullying are Directly Related

Mississauga Living Arts CentreI am returning from an excellent conference on self-regulation by Stuart Shankar and Jane Bertrand of York University in Toronto, held at the Mississauga Living Arts Centre and sponsored by the Peel Region District School Board. This was the twenty-fourth annual school psychology conference which the PSB has sponsored.
Self-regulation is closely related to the topic of bullying. Self-regulation is about stress and about identifying stressors so you can do something about them. Replace them or change something so that you are no longer stressed. Dr. Shankar emphasized that self-regulation is NOT self-control; it is what makes self-control possible.

Question: How does a child get self-regulated?
Answer: A child gets self-regulated by being regulated.

As teachers, we want our children to be calm so they will be focused and alert. Dr. Shankar really helped me to understand how stressors can affect children and youth negatively and as a result they can have a tough time learning or even functioning in a classroom.
Shankar and Bertrand presented the Five Domains of Self-Regulation. They are: 1/ Arousal Regulation (Physiological)
2/ Emotion
3/ Cognitive
4/ Social
5/ Pro-social

The above five self-regulation domains are all related. One level affects another. People are hyper or hypo sensitive to many things such as bright lighting, visual stimulation or auditory distractions. Auditory distractions are the single greatest stressor so it is important to consider ambient noise, chair clatter and bells or buzzers. These can all have a negative effect on students and their ability to cope in the classroom or their ability to learn effectively.

One segment of the presentation dealt with the teen brain. In teenage years, the brain is driven into cycles of restlessness and exhaustion and in most cases teens are not able to identify their own state of arousal. In other words, they may not realize they are tired or be able to recognize some of their other body states.
Here are the 6 Stages of Arousal as described by Dr. Shankar:
1/ Asleep 2/ Drowsy 3/ Hypo-alert 4/ Calmly focused & alert 5/ Hyper-alert 6/ Flooded
If a teen is constantly being stimulated (for example with TV or video games or skateboarding etc.), then they may be headed for difficulties unless they have a good level of awareness of their own bodies. Teens are natural risk-takers because of the state of the teenage brain, but we need to understand that planful risk-taking is much less likely to get a teen into trouble. Shankar says we need to teach teens their six levels of awareness so they can learn self-regulation.

Jane Bertrand taught us seven keys to a self-regulated classroom. They are:
1/ Classroom makeover (pastel walls with little clutter)
2/ Alert programme
3/ Exercise breaks
4/ Fidgit toys
5/ Playing with clay or modeling medium
6/ Womb room (Snoezelen room)
7/ Yoga

So much fascinating information on the brain and self-regulation. Thanks to you both, Stuart Shanker and Jane Bertrand and to the Peel School Board for sponsoring the event.

Bruce Langford is an anti-bullying advocate who presents bullying prevention workshops in Toronto, Mississauga, North York, Kitchener and London Ontario. www.standupnow.ca telephone: 905-233-2102

Are You Immune to Bullying? Learn about Someone who Is.

I just talked to a 10-year-old boy who told me he is immune to mean comments, teasing and also bullying.
I asked him to explain.

He told me that he just doesn’t let the comment or teasing register in his brain. He just ignores it. He said it is just a natural thing and it isn’t even hard to do.
I asked him, “how long have you had this ability?”
Him: “About one and a half or two years.”
Me: Do you realize that this might mean that you will never be bullied because you will never think of meanness as bullying?
Him: “Yes, I realize that. I think that’s a really good thing.”
Me: “How does this make you feel now that you know that you have this ability?”
Him: “I think it is kind of a super-hero-like power really.”
Me: Yes, I can see that it might be.
Him: Just the other day some kids were saying some mean stuff to me and I didn’t even care.
Me: Do you think they were trying to bully you?
Him: Maybe, but I’m not sure. They just stopped because I didn’t give them a reaction.
Me: Do you think there are very many other people with this power you are describing?
Him: I don’t know anyone else.
Me: Do you think other people could develop this power, or is it only reserved for certain people?
Him: I think there are a few people that could do it, but I think most people can’t.
Me: What do you think a bully would do if they knew you had this super-power?
Him: Leave me alone.
Me: Do you think you have any other super powers?
Him: (Thoughtfully) I’m not sure, maybe.

I have never talked to someone who described themselves as being immune to mean remarks and bullying before. I think this is quite interesting. If you have any comments, I would be pleased if you would share them in the comment box. Thanks.

Bruce Langford, Anti-bullying advocate and school presenter  www.standupnow.ca 
905-233-2102

3 Amazing Quotes which offer Bullying Advice to those being Bullied

“It gets better. It seems hard, you know, I think being different is always gonna be a tough climb. There’s always gonna be people that are scared of it. But at the end of the day you give those bullies, those people, that are so ignorant, if you give them the power to affect you, you’re letting them win. And they don’t deserve that. What you’re doing by being yourself is you’re keeping it real, and you’re being really brave.”
Adam Lambert

“When people see you’re happy doing what you’re doing, it sort of takes the power away from them to tease you about it.”
Wendy Mass, Every Soul A Star

“With ignorance comes fear- from fear comes bigotry. Education is the key to acceptance.”
Kathleen Patel, The Bullying Epidemic-the guide to arm you for the fight

Bruce Langford , anti-bullying advocate and speaker www.brucelangford.ca

 

Children come first at Quinte Mohawk School in Belleville Ontario

Bullying prevention and child safety is of top importance at Quinte Mohawk School in Belleville Ontario. Principal, Kathleen Vanderville makes sure children are the first priority at her school and that was obvious during our visit yesterday. Quinte Mohawk is brimming with beautiful murals, paintings, artwork and displays to proudly celebrate their culture.
Just look at this awesome painted door with the following script:

Children are…

Amazing – acknowledge them.
Believable – trust them.
Childlike – allow them.
Divine – honour them.
Energetic – nourish them.
Fallible – embrace them.
Gifts – treasure them.
Here Now – be with them.
Innocent – delight with them.
Joyful – appreciate them.
Kindhearted – learn from them.
Lovable – cherish them.
Magical – fly with them.
Noble – esteem them.
Open minded – respect them.
Precious – value them.
Questioners – encourage them.
Resourceful – support them.
Spontaneous – enjoy them.
Talented – believe in them.
Unique – affirm them.
Vulnerable – protect them
Whole – recognize them.
Xtraspecial – celebrate them.
Yearning – notice them.
Zany – laugh with them.

We thank Quinte Mohawk
School for the wonderful
hospitality and warm welcome!

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Bruce Langford presented ‘Stand Up Against Bullying’ student assemblies at Quinte Mohawk school yesterday. See his website at: http://www.standupagainstbullying.com

Parent Reaching Out Grants for Bullying Prevention Programs

Government subsidies can help with bullying  prevention. Parent Reaching Out (PRO) Grants for Ontario School Councils are available for 2012 to help increase parent involvement in support of student achievement and well-being. Be sure to apply for 2013 funding once the applications are released, so that you can use your funds for a good cause within your school. Many school councils choose to fund bullying prevention programs as well as purchase anti-bullying books and resources for their school libraries. We have delivered many bullying prevention programs in schools, made possible with the funding from the Ontario Government’s Parent Reaching Out grants.

Great feedback has been received from parents, teachers, principals and students. Here are some comments:

“Bruce Langford’s Stand Up Now programs were excellent, filled with valuable content of benefit to our students. I would gladly endorse this program.”
Ms. Marika Boshyk, Principal St. Demetrius Catholic School Toronto  Toronto Catholic District School Board

“I was impressed with how each presentation was tailored to the needs and interest level of each division. The presentations were creative and interactive and they certainly captured the attention of the students. Thank you again for addressing such an important topic in such an engaging manner.”
Ms. Kim Moses, Teacher Trillium Woods Public School, Richmond Hill  York Region District School Board

“Bruce, we loved your interactive approach with the audience during your presentations, giving our students an opportunity to voice their concerns around bullying through the question and answer portion of the assembly. Your presentation fostered a comfort level with the students that encourage them to be open and honest during the assembly, qualities that tend to be lost when dealing with issues of bullying.”
Claudio Moschella (Acting VP) Earnscliffe Senior Public School, Bramption Peel District School Board

Bruce Langford offers bullying prevention presentations for schools and parent groups
www.standupagainstbullying.com  Phone 905-233-2102

Don’t Keep It Inside, Tell Someone You Trust!

Why do so many of us clam up when someone says or does something mean to us? That’s how bullying can start. I can tell you, there have been times in the past when I lacked confidence. I would question myself. Did I say something wrong? Did I give a mean impression? Honestly, we all lack confidence at certain times. We all have to build ourselves up sometimes.

One of the best ways to deal with this is by deciding not to keep these thoughts inside. Talk about it with someone you trust. Write down your ideas in a journal. Share with someone you are sure you can depend on, but other than that, keep it private.

This can really help to deal with bullying situations in your own life.  

http://www.standupagainstbullying.com/

Bullying and The Haiti Earthquake Disaster

Bullying is a huge problem in our country and in many countries. The people of Haiti are suffering desperately because of a natural disaster.
We can help deal with bullying, but we also need to be willing to help people in critical times like this in Haiti. There are many ways to help people in the Haiti earthquake zone. Google has a link on the Google home page.
Save The Children is only one of the many organizations that is working feverishly to help.
We at Stand Up Now are donating part of our proceeds to Save The Children. You can learn what Save The Children is doing by clicking on this link Save The Children

Please do what you can to help minimize bullying and also help those in Haiti.

Visit our Website at www.standupagainstbullying.com

Looking for Actors for Bullying Prevention Programs

We are searching for people to play various roles in scenarios which will be produced into videos to be used in bullying prevention programs. Do you know someone who would be interested?
Actors who participate in these videos can really help to make a difference in the life of a bullied child.

Please contact us at info@standupnow.ca

Visit our website at www.standupagainstbullying.com